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Respite Care – my point of you

It is crucial you have a break from the caring role now and again to recharge your batteries, catch up on sleep, or maybe go away for a few days. It makes you a better person and the caring role doesn’t seem quite so tough. Not only that, if respite care is regular it gives you something to look forward to.

Pete refused to go anywhere at first because he is insecure. He thought I’d run off with someone else, forget about him, not want him back, get up to things while he wasn’t there etc. In fact, I allowed this to happen for at least fifteen of the thirty years I have cared for him. I didn’t want him to think I was “trying to get rid of him” which was his favourite excuse for not going into respite care.

After this period of time, the caring role got more and more difficult because Pete had deteriorated so much and I was becoming extremely depressed with it all.

Respite Care   my point of you

It was going to take an awful lot of courage to tell Pete that if he didn’t give me a break, I was going to leave him. This is what I decided I was going to do the next time he was offered respite and he turned it down yet again. I decided he would have to think what he thought and just put up with whatever it was he was going to throw at me. This thought took a lot of strength but I really was determined.

Well I think the vibes I had been transmitting to him beforehand must have worked for me, because he was offered respite and decided to look into it, so I didn’t need to tell him what I was going to tell him. The owners of the care home visited him and explained what happened there. I then took him over there to show him what it was like and he decided to give it a go for a week. I couldn’t believe my ears. Was I hearing things? He’s going to try respite? Pete will only go away if it benefits him. If he hadn’t liked the look of it, he wouldn’t have gone. He certainly wouldn’t have gone just to give me a break that’s for sure. What do I need a break for? Who did I want to see? What could I possibly want to do without him?

When he went there, they looked after him, gave him ciggies when he wanted them, took him out for lunch, and took him to a show. He really enjoyed it. I should have gone away for a few days but decided to decorate the lounge while I had a chance and my sister came over to help me bless her. When he returned, the lounge looked lovely and everything was in some sort of order at last. I’d even sorted his CD’s into alphabetical order. That really pleased him.

If you want to go somewhere to recharge your batteries and have a rest from caring, there is a lovely guest house on the Isle of Arran, Scotland.